I'd like to get one thing
perfectly clear right from the
start. This will be a review
completely devoid of trendy
quotes from Hammer's
godawful song. Let's face it - the thing
sounds as if it was written over the
weekend for both a large fee and a bet. It's
repetitive, ridiculously bass-heavy, and
sports the kind of lyrics usually associated
with the midnight people who mumble at
lampposts and fall over a lot. As far as I'm
concerned, Mr Baggy's soundtrack-of-the-marketing-department's-idea-of-a-film
serves only as a ghastly reminder of the
extent to which the pictures have
become commercialised. So yah
boo to him, a soulful grump to
Hollywood at large and on with
the review.
The plot of the game is too simple to
waffle on about. You play Gomez, the
other Addamses have been imprisoned
within the house, and you have to find them.
The one noteworthy point is that when you find
someone, you have to win their confidence by
completing a particularly difficult screen.
Hmmm. Anyway, the game. Gone are the
splendidly nasty elements of the film -in
their place is a cutey-pie platformer which
steals bits of everything from
Jet Set Willy
to
Atic Atac. One more thing - it's massive.
There are about 240 baddie-packed screens
to dash around, not to mention the trial-by-fire
bits that pop up when you find a character.
Tragically, you've no weapons to help you in your
quest - the only thing that stands
between you and certain death is
your trusty pair of stout walking
boots. A hop, a skip, and provided
you land on a nasty's head,
a pummelling blow
against the forces of
evil. As you buzz
around the mansion
and its surroundings
(the graveyard, the
woods, the furnace,
the bus stop, etc.) you'll
find your progress impeded
by locked doors. To open 'em you
have to find the appropriate
coloured key. A mapper's game,
indeed.
Spooky bits!
So, what have we got? Why, a
blimmin' big game that's effectively
split up into six smaller sections by the
locked doors feature. The graphics are
small, frighteningly well-animated and
rippling with colour. On the sound
side, the TV theme tune warbles away in attract mode,
while the game itself boasts crisp, twangy effects. The
gameplay is tough but vastly playable - each screen is
a textbook example of devious design - and the ability
to bash the nasties as well as leap over them adds
spice to the proceedings. Speaking of the bad guys,
they're as motley and bonkers a crew of villainous
greeblies as I've seen in many a moon. Armoured
knights trudge around, periodically stabbing the air with
their broadswords. Rubber balls with evil grins bounce
on the very spots you want to pass. Pumpkins,
amoebae, nightmare bats and speed demons patrol
the mansion with terribly efficiency. There are loads of
snappy touches in the game as well. Some platforms
start to collapse as you jump onto them - you have to
be quick to get off before they drop you onto a
passing nasty. And although the playing
area is huge, you can't just wander about
aimlessly. A line of hearts beat beneath
your lives counter, and their friendly
pulsing diminishes with time If you don't
replenish 'em with an all-too-rare power
icon, you'll keel over. Caramba! Even more
upsettingly, in some rooms you'll come
across innocuous-looking clocks which disgorge
mutated cuckoos when you least expect it. Even more
caramba! Without a doubt, this game is fat, Megagame
material.
Or at least, it would be, but for one thing. The
control system is screamingly horrible. Gomez can
travel at three speeds, depending on how far you've
moved him without stopping. The faster you're
going, the further you can jump. This allows for a
greater variety of tricks and traps in the screens,
with some having to be avoided at top speed, while
others demand you tiptoe past in respectful terror.
Unfortunately, this idea just doesn't come off. You find
yourself battling the
joystick as well as the baddies - the
controls seem sticky, and the stop-start
movement puts the boot into the pace
of the game. While we're on the subject
of griping, I'm not particularly fond of
being sent back to the nearest doorway
whenever Gomez gets zapped. Why not
just restart on the same screen?
Don't despair - though the control
method gives it the old college try, it
can't destroy the game. The smart
addictive qualities keep you coming
back to the action, and the basic idea of
pitting your sneaky wits directly against
the programmers' is irresistible. You could even argue that
with three skill levels - determining how hard the trial-by-fire screens are - you've got three games for the
price of one. Yes indeedy, there's definitely a good
few weeks o' fun to be had with
The Addams Family.
It's just that the annoying, quirky bits stop it from
reaching the dizzy heights of true fabdom.
What a shame.
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