I've no idea why we've
never reviewed Sidewinder
2. Originally released by
Mastertronic back in the heady days of
1989, (I lived in a house called Dalrod
that year, y'know) this is a perfectly
respectable spacey shoot-'em-'up a la
a monochrome Xecutor. Okay, so it's
nothing amazing but it's simply
not bad enough to ignore.
I suppose you could call it
discrimination, but I like
games where you have jump
into a space-hopping podule
and blow up lots of things. I
like crashing into planets and
disintegrating into tiny glowing
particles. I know that
Sidewinder 2
is an old game with old-fashioned
graphics and bleepy sound, but I
enjoyed it. Yep! I was expecting it to
be completely dire, but it's the most
throwaway, bubble-gum kinda fun
game I've played in, oooh, about
half an hour. There is a plot to
Sidewinder 2 but it's not
worth going into, the
gameplay too is the
usual kind of thing, simply
get into your spaceship, fly up the
vertically-rolling screen, blow up
everything in sight and replace your wasted
bullets by picking up more along the way.
(Well, I did say it was simple.) The game itself
is far from the most difficult of its ilk that I've
played, but neither is it ridiculously easy. With
games like this you either a) decide early on to
keep on trying or you b) leave it for now and
go and fix a marshmallow fluff and peanut
butter sandwich. The decision depends largely
on how good the game is (and how much you
like marshmallow fluff and peanut butter
sandwiches) and
Sidewinder 2 isn't a good
enough game to hook you. Still, after
a few sandwiches you won't be
able to move and with
the joystick in your
marshmallowy mitt and all your
other games upstairs you'll probably
start to enjoy
Sidewinder 2 more than
you thought.
£3.99 doesn't go far
these days...
(I
suppose you
remember when
crisps were
five pence a packet? Jon)
(Well, yes I do. What are you doing? Stop
mucking around with my letter groupings. Go
away!) As I was saying, before I was so
rudely interrupted, four quid can't even buy
you a Curtis Stigers CD single in HMV these
days. So why not throw caution to the wind
and pick up a game that's nearly as fun as Mr
Stigers' hair? I know that's not saying much,
but hey!
Sidewinder 2 isn't too bad really.
[One of the "Ones That Got Away" reviews -NickH]