Traffic wardens are not
renowned for their sympathetic,
affectionate view of life, nor for
their compassionate attitude
towards hairy lorry drivers with
tattoos on their arms; so this is
probably why Grand Siam
decided to name the traffic
warden in it's latest release
Chubby Gristle (Obviously a
reference to the typecast view of
blubbery wardens with the
personality of an onion and
physical attributes of a
cardboard box! But despite the
inventiveness of the title, the
game falls short by several light
years in originality, brilliance and
general appeal.
Skimming over the surface of
this game, you'll discover that
what you have is nothing more
than another platform game. A
wandering succession of
gruesomely-coloured screens
populated by such things as
scissors and amorphous anteaters - the usual platform
cliches. Of course, you also have
your little flashing objects which
you must collect by
manoeuvring your plump form
between two colliding
saucepans. Hazards include
water, lava and something hot
and aqueous, which drops onto
yellow concrete, as well as one-way moving ladders - all very
rudimentary.
Your character is a small,
rotund person who moves quite
smoothly and responsively. The
action is placid. Sounds are
restricted to beepy leaping trills
and doleful beepy death noises,
all pretty antiquated and very,
well, beepy.
The game is essentially
Auf
Wiedersehen Monty with the
setting, purpose and
attractiveness of the Gremlin
game replaced by blunt screen
design, reiterated plot and
languid gameplay.